Bereaved by Suicide

Suicide bereavement, like any loss, will take time to process and each person will cope in their own way. You might find some of these suggestions helpful:

• Take time out — It’s ok to give yourself time out from the pain you are experiencing by doing something you enjoy, even if you don’t feel like doing it all the time.

• Accept your feelings – you may feel a variety of emotions such as grief, despair, anger, guilt, denial, shock, confusion, loneliness, anxiety and even in some cases, relief. All feelings are a normal part of the grieving process.

• Care for yourself – do your best to eat well, hydrate, exercise and get quality sleep. Taking care of your physical and emotional self will help you get through each day.

• Stay connected and accept support from friends, family and support networks.

• You may want to honour the deceased person– talk about them, share memories/photos or practice any spiritual or cultural activities that are meaningful to you.

• Consider joining a suicide bereavement group – sharing your experience with others who have been through similar loss might be helpful for you to connect and feel less alone.

• Ask for help – talk to a counsellor/psychologist, a helpline like Lifeline, friends and family, online support groups, or a GP to find support and healthy ways to cope.

 

If you know someone bereaved by suicide, you can help by: 

• Contacting the person, as you would with any other death, to let them know you acknowledge the situation and care 
• Listening — remember that the role of the helper is to listen, not solve 
• Accepting the person and their feelings, whatever they might be and not judging 
• Letting them cry 
• Not asking ‘why’ or if there was anything that could have been done
• Encouraging them to talk about the death with any children — they need help too 
• Mentioning the loved one by name and trying to remember important dates (birthdays etc) for the future 
• Including the bereaved person in your normal activities
• Realising that working through grief can take years and that the hurt is never forgotten 
• Urging them to wait before making any major changes such as moving, giving away possessions or quitting a job 
• Understanding they can’t just ‘get over it’ but grow their lives around it 
• Suggesting they join a suicide bereavement support group 
• If and when appropriate, asking them if they are thinking about suicide and getting them professional help if they need it

It can be very difficult to know what to do and how to cope, but help is available. Below are some places to go for information and support. If life is in danger, please call 000.

• Griefline – a free national helpline offering confidential telephone counselling (7 days a week, 6am to midnight) 1300 845 745
• StandBy – Support after Suicide – provides Australia wide support services to those bereaved or impacted by suicide. standbysupport.com.au
• Postvention Australia – provides information on support groups for those bereaved by suicide. Local Support Groups – Postvention Australia
• Beyond Blue – 1300 22 4636

Have you lost someone to suicide – Factsheet

For Crisis Support contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (24/7) or via text (12pm – 6am AEDT) on 0477 13 11 14